Went to the local cinema and caught Alice in Wonderland in 3D on Saturday. It was basically what I expected, which is a hard thing to do from the mind of Tim Burton. It was weird, eccentric, and somewhat Gothic. At times it was strikingly brilliant. And at other times it felt ordinary and disinterested. Just one man's opinion. I did enjoy the movie, and it had my full attention for two hours. And then Avril Lavigne started screeching a song during the end credits, and I couldn't have gotten out of the place faster. I'm a guy who stays well into the credits of every movie. Check out the names, let everyone else filter out, just slowly cap off my movie viewing experience. But the sound of Lavigne's bellowing was so heinous I ran out of the theater as though a chicken breast was taped to my ass and I was being looked at by a disheveled alligator.
Johnny Depp needs to go back to regular roles. The guy is a fantastic actor, and yes he has made a career playing the strange roles. But seriously it has to end. He clearly was having a lot of fun in Alice, and why wouldn't he. His best friend is directing and they pretty much just let each other do as they please. But he couldn't make up his mind on whether the Mad Hatter was a gay Scotsman, or an angry, English tailor. I just want Depp to go back to normal roles. Anyone every seen Donnie Brasco with Pacino? Or even Public Enemies was at least watchable because Depp played a normal guy. I'm sick of weird accents and spoonfuls of makeup. His performance in Alice just solidified my thought that if Depp gets cast in the third Batman flick as The Riddler, I will strongly consider not seeing it in theaters.
Not to sound uppity, but we went to a theater in St. Louis Park, and they have VIP seating. Now that's not a big big deal, but the theater was set-up as if we were in medieval times. The VIP's were above us surfs, and there was, and I shit you not, at least a 10 foot high wall between the two of us. I know it is hard to visually see, but the sight was astonishing. Why yes lets visit the cinema this eve, have a few spirits, and possible throw our popcorn at the peasants. I love watching them scrounge for their food on a Saturday.
And lastly, because I went to the theater to view a PG-rated movie (no idea when the last time I did that) we saw mainly awful previews. And the icing on the cake, or in this case, diarrhea in the toilet, was Furry Vengeance. Here is the synopsis from IMDB:
In the Oregon wilderness, a real-estate developer's (Brendan Fraser) new housing subdivision faces a unique group of protesters, local woodland creatures who don't want their home disturbed.
Wow. I sat with my mouth open, and had to hold my chin so it would not hit the floor. In the trailer Brendan Fraser was subjected to getting pooped on by birds, getting skunked by a pack of skunks, and getting stuck in a port-o-potty, then having said port-o-potty tipped over by a herd of deer. The worst part of this all, people were actually laughing at the trailer. Not that I try to be high and mighty, but you have to be god damn kidding me about this movie. I would rather suck on an AIDS soaked corn cob while getting defiled by a rabid wolverine then ever have to view this movie.
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